I always thought the “but satisfaction brought him back” part was a joke from the Munsters.
Here’s another one: “Jack of all trades, master of none,” is just one half of the saying. The other half reads “but better than a master of one.”
Okay one more: “Ignorance is bliss” is also only half of the saying. It’s “When ignorance is bliss, ‘tis folly to be wise.”
Pixar can never top this.
Can we take a moment to appreciate the fact that the best loved line from this movie comes from a character we never even got to see?
transparent ghost sticky notes help you make notes without defacing a book
I HAVE THESE THEY’RE MY FAVORITE
This pleases me
omg i want a barbie that says EAT LEAD, COBRA
Doesn’t look like a limerick to you? Try this:
A dozen, a gross, and a score
Plus three times the square root of four
Divided by seven
Plus five times eleven
Is nine squared and not a bit more.
THE FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCCCKKKKKKK
There’s this girl at my school and she’s really nice and I remember sometime last year at one point she would carry a clicker around and click it everytime she had a happy thought/something good happened/she laughed etc.
It was always kind of cute how you’d just hear the little click every once in a while throughout class it always made me smile knowing that it was bc something made her feel happy idk
she was training herself to be happy oh my god
"Knock,knock. Mr Criminal? Hey, my name is Spider-Man. You can call me Web-Head, you can call me Amazing, just don’t call me late for dinner. You get it?"
when my dad was in law school he knew these two girls who told him “people look at us like we were meat anyway so we decided to make some money off of it” so they wore bikinis and high heels and sold WAY overpriced hot dogs as a way of financing their education. they graduated summa cum laude with no debt and let me just say i have never been so inspired
how to be cool
A) cool sunglasses emoji
is that a god damn pun. in emoticon format
my friend forced me to his party so i started melting together candy corn into a candy corncob an hour and a half ago
i used up all the lighter fluid and now i don’t know what to do with this mass of sugar
ah you’re watching sherlock? i love that show! the way they just [clenches fist] make sure it’s a lock
ah you’re watching sherlock? i love that show! the way they just [clenches fist] update every five years